I'm hurt and it's not okay. it's hard to forgive something that has nothing good about it. growing up with this hatred around me seems normal but when it comes to forgiving and forgetting I don't understand how it can be done so easily. the weight on my chest gets heavier and taking a deep breath just isn't easy anyone. you don't get the relief you hope for. why is it so easy for others to forgive, don't they feel the same hatred as I do considering it's come from them. can love really overpower it? I just don't feel that anymore. any shred of it has been distorted by disappointment and failure.
they say money cant buy happiness. yet when it's taken from so you brutally and your left with nothing and still they never learn from their mistakes I don't know how they can live with that. it's like living with a fish you'll feed and sometimes clean it but it has no importance and is not necessary and you waste money and time on it then what's the point?! how can the love be there when you've been hurt so badly?
thoughts from CHOWDER